2.19.2009

Did You Burn Your Finger?


I'm feeling sick today. I woke up with swollen glands everywhere and my left ear was throbbing. I absolutely hate being sick because I'm a complete baby. When I finally drug myself out of bed this morning, I went straight to the couch and realized it was snowing outside. Yesterday was in the 60's and today it is snowing. UGH!!!

Anyway, I finally mustered up enough strength to crawl over to the gas fireplace and turn it on. As I brought my head up, I banged it on the corner of the mantle and put a gash in my forehead. That was all I could take! I stuck my face in the couch and began to sob. I mean big hard shoulder shaking sobs. The boys came over from their breakfast and tried to console me with sweet words. Jayden thought I had burnt my hand on the fire and offered ice but I couldn't even explain to him there was no need for that. I was crying too hard.

I think some of my tears were for the throbbing in my head and some of them were for the ache I felt all over my body. But truth be told, I feel some of it was just me being sad that my house hasn't sold yet. Why hasn't God come in to save the day? Doesn't He know we're ready to do all that we've promised Him. We want to move forward with everything and yet we can't until this hurdle is out of the way.

I spent pretty much all of my day in my spot on the couch feeling really sorry for myself. It's not to say I didn't have good reason to have my little pity party but when I consider so many others, my trials are pretty trivial. My sister-in-law's dad is in the hospital on a respirator at this very moment and they can't seem to find out what is wrong with him. I can't even imagine the anguish she is going through.

The Riggs Family spent the day giving their four year-old little girl chemo treatments at home. They adopted Abby from Guatemala when she was six months old expecting a lifetime with her. God had other plans though. He knew this little girl had a rough road ahead of her and had the perfect family to walk with her through this battle.

The Salza Family had to watch as doctors put their newborn back on the ventilator yesterday. I went to school with Shellie and I am amazed with her strength. She had him 3 months early and his birth weight was 1 lb 12 oz. Please pray for this sweet little guy and his family as he fights for his life.

Where is God in all these situations? I promise you, He is right in the midst of each and everyone of them. It's in the times of despair and anguish when He is carrying us and holding us. If He weren't, I'm pretty sure none of us could get through this battle we call life. I don't know how people who don't know Him even get out of bed in the morning. Life is sometimes just plain hard. I am so grateful that He cares about every detail of my life, gashed foreheads and all!!!

1 comment:

Susan said...

Oh, my. :-( I am so sorry for your morning!

I recall a sermon David Wilkerson once preached about God putting a sentence of death on the promises He gives us, so that when they are resurrected after there is no human way of achieving it, we will be sure to glorify Him! He had a bunch of illustrations—Abraham and Sarah, Joseph, the Red Sea, and so forth. It was called "The Death of a Promise." I wonder if it's online somewhere?

Anyway, the image of you so sad just makes me want to send you a hug! Hang in there, Rebecca! You'll get there!

I'm glad you're writing about all this. It's part and parcel of the journey, isn't it? These hidden valleys seem to disappear when we retell the story years later, looking back over the peaks.